(Satire) Kung Fu Monkey Found Dead – The Ludicrous Times

The world mourns its furriest defender.

Local world-renowned film star, philanthropist, and self-declared “dirty toilet devil,” Raffles, the Kung Fu Monkey, was found dead Saturday. The official cause of death has yet to be reported, due to his status as a monkey.

“Normally when you find a dead monkey, you can safely attribute it to a lion or heroin,” said assistant coroner Kristoff Belk. “With Raffles, though, it could have been anything from a One- to Seven-Finger Touch of Death.”

Source: Kung Fu Monkey Found Dead


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